


Prison Blues

by tmchen



Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU, Destiel - Freeform, Family Issues, Hurt/Comfort, Prison
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-23
Updated: 2015-03-22
Packaged: 2018-02-26 18:40:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 20,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2662352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tmchen/pseuds/tmchen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean only has a few more months left in prison when he gets a new cellmate. Castiel claims to be innocent and Dean believes and helps him. A few months later it's Cas' turn to help Dean. Their relationship progresses to something so much more than cellmates.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

He was watching the new inmates arrive, quickly assessing them and finding out who might be a trouble maker and who would fit in well. New arrivals were always a nice change in his boring every day routine. Making assumptions about their personalities was fun and he was almost always right. He was good at reading people and most of the people who came here were thugs and looked the part, but one of the newbies was different.

That one won't have it easy, he thought as the last of the new inmates passed him. He looked intimidated and just a little too pretty with his dark, tousled hair and stunning blue eyes, which caught Dean's for a moment, before he was pushed further along the corridor.

The bell rang then, telling everyone to go back to their cells. The show was over now anyway, so Dean quickly made his way back to the cell he currently wasn't sharing with anyone. That would probably change today and he wondered who his new cellmate would be.

He didn't have to wait long. The new inmates had apparently been processed quickly this time and soon a guard was leading someone towards Dean's cell and opened the door. Dean looked up to see the man with the intense blue eyes he had noticed earlier standing in the door, taking a tentative step inside the cell, just enough for the guard to close and lock the door behind him.

The man remained standing there by the door, not daring to look at Dean, apparently terrified of him and the entire situation. Dean decided that he had to make the first move here. He didn't mean the man any harm. He was hoping for his parole to be granted any time now and he couldn't afford any trouble.

Usually he didn't have to worry about getting in trouble because his fellow inmates had soon realized that Dean Winchester wasn't a push-over and would fight back if he had to. And usually he won those fights. But he was fair and mostly just wanted to be left alone and the others respected him and let him be. It was easier for all of them.

"Hey, I'm Dean," he said, giving the new guy an encouraging smile.

"Castiel," the guy answered quietly but with a voice much lower and more gravelly than Dean would have expected.

"I sleep up here," Dean told him, pointing to the neatly made top bed, "so yours will be the bottom bunk."

Castiel nodded and finally moved, depositing his pile of sheets and personal belongings, which he'd been clutching to his chest so far, on the mattress. He started to put his personal things away and Dean quickly cleared some space on the few shelves they had available.

"So, what did you do to land in here?" Dean asked, thinking that his new cellmate looked more like an accountant than a criminal.

"Nothing," came the quiet reply.

"Yeah. Never heard that before," Dean sighed, rolling his eyes. "What were you charged with then?"

"Embezzlement. But I was framed by my boss," Castiel told him, looking directly at Dean for the first time since he had entered the cell. And just from the look in his eyes Dean could tell that this man was telling the truth. He didn't deserve to be here and in that moment he decided to protect Castiel from all the evil things that could happen to a good man in prison.

"What about you?" Castiel asked now. "What did you do to end up here?" He was getting bolder now that it seemed clear that Dean wasn't going to beat him up or worse.

"Armed robbery," Dean replied. "I did it for my baby brother. He was sick and we couldn't afford to see a doctor, so I held up a convenience store. The gun wasn't even loaded. I didn't want to risk hurting anyone by accident. Turned myself in as soon as Sammy was better," he elaborated, while at the same time wondering why he felt the need to explain himself.

Outside of court he had never told anyone the whole story, yet somehow he felt that this guy, Castiel, deserved to know the truth. He wanted him to know the truth and understand why he had done it.

Castiel nodded. "I'm sure it was a hard choice to make. The robbery I mean."

Dean gave a curt nod.

"Does he visit you often? Your brother?"

"No," Dean replied, sadness creeping into his voice and eyes. "He was upset that I turned myself in and left him. Said I could have gotten away with it." He missed his brother. But the ungrateful bastard had turned his back on him when Dean had decided to do the right thing.

"What about you?" he asked after a moment. "Is anyone going to be visiting you?" A man like that surely had a sweet wife and at least two adorable kids waiting for him on the outside.

"My sister Anna. She's my lawyer and she's trying to find some evidence that will exonerate me."

"I hope she can," Dean said and meant it.

"If she can't, then no one can. She's the best," Castiel answered, the love and admiration for his sister evident in his eyes. "But it's not gonna be easy. My wife had an affair with my boss and helped him frame me. And now she's using my conviction as a reason for a divorce. Not that I'd want to stay married to her after what she did," he added, clearly feeling betrayed.

"I hope your sister finds something," Dean told him sincerely and Castiel gave him a shy smile. The first smile probably since his world had come crashing down around him.

Just when Dean was trying to figure out what to say to change the subject to something happier and cheer up his new cellmate some more, their door was opened again and two guards stood there.

"Novak, time to shower. I'll show you the way," the first said and Castiel grabbed his towel and left with him.

"Winchester, the director wants to see you," the second guard said. "You can shower afterwards."

And Dean, knowing that this was about his parole, had no choice but to follow the guard and hope Castiel would be okay on his own.


	2. Chapter 2

Dean had been right about the reason why the director wanted to see him. Dean was a model prisoner and the director had wanted to give him the good news personally.

"Your parole has been granted. It will start in three months from today," he told Dean who smiled a little at the prospect of getting out so soon. "But…," the director continued and Dean's head shot up to look at him, worried that something had gone wrong after all. "…since you have exhibited such good behavior, I can give you some time off for that, which means you'll be leaving in six weeks already."

"Thank you, Sir," Dean answered, feeling positively ecstatic about the good news. He'd been in prison for a year now and couldn't wait to get out again. A year had been the minimum sentence before he had been eligible for parole. A few weeks ago he had met with the parole board and gone through all the interviews and assessments and he'd had the feeling that everything had gone well. Now he was being released in only six weeks and not another year like the original sentence had stated.

He felt happier as he ever had since his Dad had left him and Sam to fend for themselves a few years ago. It had been a hard time. He had just finished school and started college and Sam had still been in school. Dean had immediately dropped out of college and found a job to somehow support them and get Sam through school. They had never had enough money but with a few extra jobs now and then they had survived.

But then Sam had gotten sick. His fever had kept on rising no matter what Dean had tried and since he'd missed work for a few days to be with Sam he had lost his job. Eventually Sam had gotten so bad that Dean was afraid for his life and without a job and without insurance he hadn't know how to help himself other than stealing the money he needed to get the right treatment for his baby brother. So with the old handgun his Dad had left behind, he had gone and robbed a store and then he'd taken Sam to a hospital.

Sam had stayed in the hospital for almost a week and Dean had never left his side. When Sam was better Dean had swallowed his pride and asked an old family friend, Bobby Singer, for help. Bobby had immediately agreed to take the brothers in but Dean hadn't been able to live with the guilt of having scared the poor cashier, he had robbed, half to death. He had tried talking to Sam about it but Sam had been outraged at the thought of Dean leaving him and had tried to convince him to stay. Dean had tried but he couldn't. He'd had to make things right and after writing a letter to Sam, again explaining his motives, he had gone to the next police station and turned himself in.

He hadn't seen Sam again. Bobby had come to every one of his court dates but Sam hadn't. Bobby had said that Sam just needed time and Dean had been patient but it was over a year now and he still hadn't heard from his brother. Now he wasn't sure if he even wanted to anymore.

But for the moment he pushed the thought away. It made him sad and today was a day to be happy. He was being released very soon and if he could, he would have celebrated but that was of course hard to do in a cell. So for now he settled on getting his soap and towel from his cell and then quickly go take a shower as long as there was still time to do so.

The changing room was empty. As there were only about ten minutes left to take a shower, all the other inmates from this wing were apparently done and were now spending the free hour they got before lockup, with card games or watching TV. Dean didn't mind. He preferred being alone. Showering with all those guys was always an awkward experience, so being late wasn't bad at all, even if he didn't much time left anymore.

He quickly took off his clothes and went into the steam filled room with the communal showers. He stopped right by the first shower head and turned on the water, when he heard a noise from the far side of the room. He had noticed that one shower was still running but sometimes someone just forgot to turn them off or the controls broke, so he hadn't paid any attention to that yet, wanting to wash himself first.

But what he had heard had been a whimper, which meant someone was still there. He gave the hot spray falling from the shower head a longing look, then sighed and turned the water off. He had to check who was in the room with him first and make sure they were okay.

The steam thinned the closer he got and he noticed a dark haired man lying on the floor, curled up in a fetal position and facing the wall. Water was beating down on him and he shivered. Dean checked the controls and saw that they had been turned to ice-cold. Quickly he shut it off and then crouched down to see who was lying there.

"Castiel?" he asked when he finally caught a glimpse of the man's face. He carefully touched the man's shoulder, trying to turn him towards him a bit but the other flinched away from the touch and Dean removed his hand again.

"Castiel. Cas, it's me, Dean. I won't hurt you," he told the terrified man and only now noticed the traces of blood on the floor that hadn't been washed away by the water. No wonder the guy was afraid. Whatever had happened, it hadn't been pretty.

"Dean?" came the broken question and Castiel finally turned his head to look up at Dean.

"Yes, Castiel. I'm here. What happened?"

"I don't know. They just hurt me for no reason. I didn't do anything," Castiel replied looking utterly lost and shocked, not only from the physical abuse but also by the fact that people would just do something like that to others for no reason.

"I know you didn't," Dean told him softly. Other than looking too pretty and too innocent and too much everything the other inmates would never be, he added silently. "How bad is it? Can you get up?"

Castiel nodded slowly and with Dean's help he got to his feet. They carefully walked back to the changing room where Dean found Castiel's clothes and helped him get dry and get dressed before making him sit down while he got dressed himself.

"Do you need to see a nurse?" Dean asked, looking at the bruises already starting to form on Castiel's face. And the way he was sitting and holding his chest suggested that he might have broken a rib.

"Yes, I think I should," he answered and winced when he tried to get up. Dean took a hold of his arm and steadied him and they slowly made their way to the medical ward.

Dean left Castiel there, knowing from experience that the nurses would take good care of him and returned to their shared cell. He didn't feel like spending time with his fellow inmates, even though usually he enjoyed a good game of cards. But today he didn't trust himself around them, not after what they had done to Castiel.


	3. Chapter 3

It was late when Castiel returned to the cell, almost time for the lights to be switched off. Dean had been reading all night, his back sinking into his pillow, which he had propped up against the wall. In prison he had discovered that he loved books, well certain books like the ones by H.P. Lovecraft, and he always read a little before lights-out. Before prison he had never really had the time to sit down and read and this was an aspect of prison life that made being locked up a little easier.

He was now reading 'The Call of Cthulhu' in a book with several short-stories, when the door to his cell was opened and Castiel stepped through. Dean marked the page he'd been reading and put the book down. Castiel was more important now than Professor Angell.

"What did the nurse say?" Dean asked as Castiel sat down on his bed and took off his shoes and socks.

"Nothing's broken. Just a few bruises. She gave me some ice for my eye and checked my ribs and then said I could go back to the cell for the night," he told Dean and groaned when he moved to lie down on the mattress. "Still hurts though," he muttered quietly.

"I'm sorry," Dean said just as quietly. "I should have been there."

"This isn't your fault, Dean. And I don't think you could have done anything," Castiel told him.

"Why would you say that? I would have told them to back off. People here know better than to mess with me," Dean answered a little hotly because Castiel had questioned his ability to protect him.

"I don't know. This guy, they called him Lucifer but I don't know if that is really his name. Fits though. Anyway, he'd been giving me these scary looks on the bus ride here already. I think he was dead set on beating me up before we even arrived," Castiel explained. "Maybe even worse," he added, so quietly that Dean could hardly make the words out.

The bell rang then, telling them they had only ten minutes left before the lights went out and Dean jumped down from his bed to put the book back on a shelve and brush his teeth. He turned to look at the man lying on the bottom bed with his eyes closed, one arm resting across his forehead as if he was trying to soothe a headache, the other hand clutching the blanket tightly as he probably relived what had happened to him in the shower.

"Just stick close to me as much as you can. I'll keep you safe," Dean told him. He meant it, too. He felt terrible that he hadn't been able to be there to protect Castiel in the shower and he was relieved to hear that he had been 'only' beaten up.

"I don't want you to have to fight my fights for me," Castiel protested weakly but Dean wasn't having any of that.

"Why not? I'm good at that. I had to learn it from an early age to protect Sammy from our Dad. He was a violent drunk," Dean explained, bitterness lacing his tone when he talked about his Dad.

"I'm sorry," Castiel whispered and gratefully accepted the wet washcloth Dean handed him, covering his forehead and eyes with it to ease the pounding in his head and the throbbing from the black eye.

"Nah, it's okay. Once I really stood up to him he stopped and got into bar fights instead. Bullies respond to strength, you know? Once people know I'm looking out for you they'll leave you alone."

"Thanks, Dean. I appreciate that. But for how long?" Castiel asked, sounding a little uncertain.

"Oh, uhm, six more weeks. My parole was granted today," Dean admitted meekly. He hadn't even thought about that problem. "We'll figure something out. And we trust your sister to get you out of here as soon as possible," he told Castiel, sounding more confident than he really felt. But a positive attitude would help the most right now he thought, as he climbed back up to his bed and the lights went out in their wing.

"I'm looking at five years, if Anna doesn't find anything," Castiel said, more to himself than to Dean. "Five years of that…. I don't think I can survive that. If the guard hadn't come in when he did, Lucifer would have…."

He didn't finish the sentence but Dean knew what he had started to say. If the guard hadn't come in, Lucifer would have raped him. "Son of a bitch," Dean said softly. He could only hope that Anna would be able to help her brother.

"Why didn't the guard help you?" he asked after a moment of silence.

"I don't think he saw me back there. He heard the commotion and thought there was a fight. He came in and told them to break it up and they stopped. I was already lying on the floor," Castiel explained and groaned again as he tried to turn over to find a comfortable sleeping position.

Dean remembered that he hadn't been able to see anything through the steam, so Castiel's explanation was probably accurate. It had just been a shitload of bad luck for him. Neither of them said anything for a while and eventually Dean decided he should try to sleep.

"Goodnight, Castiel," he whispered, in case his cellmate was already asleep.

"Goodnight, Dean," came immediately the whispered response. "And…you can call me Cas," he added and closed his eyes.

"Goodnight, Cas," Dean said and then closed his eyes as well and fell asleep soon after.

The next morning Cas looked terrible. His eye was almost swollen shut despite all the cooling from the day before and his bruised ribs had prevented him from getting much sleep. He looked tired and couldn't move very well, so now he was really grateful for Dean's offer of protection because he wouldn't even be able to run away and hide if someone approached him with questionable intentions.

He stuck close to Dean and Dean helped him where he could, showed him around and explained to him what he needed to know about life in prison. They went to breakfast together and found a table that was set aside from the rest of the tables, so they could keep away from the thugs who had beaten Castiel the night before.

This strategy worked well for them and they got through breakfast without any incidents. But when they left to get back to their cell before Dean had to show up at his job in the prison's garage and Cas had to go to get assigned for a job, a few people suddenly got up and blocked their way out of the cafeteria.

Their leader, a big, beefy guy with mean little eyes stepped forward and faced Dean, who was now shielding Cas with his body. This was probably the one who had attacked him in the shower. No wonder Cas had been so scared, it was a scary dude.

"You must be the one they call Lucifer," Dean said. He had only seen this guy before when the new inmates had arrived, so it was a pretty good guess that this was Lucifer.

"Yes," the other man, who stood almost a foot taller than Dean, answered calmly. "And you must be Dean Winchester. "I have no beef with you. Now step aside and let me have the pretty boy."

Dean could feel Cas tense behind him. The fear that was radiating off of him was almost tangible. Dean didn't want to start a fight with this mountain of a man but there was no way he was handing Cas over. He had promised to protect him and he kept his promises.

"No," he said firmly, looking right into Lucifer's cold, gray eyes.


	4. Chapter 4

"Hand over the pretty boy," Lucifer growled again, slowly and menacingly advancing on Dean.

"No. If you want him, you'll have to go through me," Dean answered calmly, standing his ground.

Lucifer just gave him an evil grin. "Oh, I will if I have to. You see, I need a pet. And he will just look so pretty with his mouth around my cock."

Dean could feel Cas starting to tremble when he grabbed the back of Dean's shirt for support. "Not gonna happen," Dean said and reached behind him to pry Cas' fingers loose. When Cas finally let go, Dean pushed him a step further away from Lucifer and readied himself for the fight that was sure to follow now.

As Lucifer and Dean stood facing each other a few people got up to stand behind Lucifer, making it clear they'd help him and ensure his victory. They were mostly new inmates who had immediately realized that it was safer to be Lucifer's supporter than his enemy. A few of the men now standing there were some Dean already knew. They were the ones who had tried to make him their bitch when he had been new and they had come to regret those attempts. Now they were practically gloating at the very real possibility of watching Dean Winchester getting his ass kicked.

But just as Dean gulped and thought that maybe he wouldn't get out of this situation unscathed, he could hear chairs scraping over the cracked linoleum and the shuffling of several pairs of feet, not just Cas' retreating steps. He turned his head briefly to see a crowd standing behind himself that was larger than the crowd backing up Lucifer. Apparently it paid off to be fair, Dean thought and smiled to himself as he turned back to face Lucifer.

Dean had barely enough time to duck because Lucifer had used his short moment of distraction to attack. "Fuck," Dean muttered. That had been close and he now paid better attention.

Luckily Lucifer relied on his size and strength rather than on technique and he telegraphed his punches so Dean had not much trouble getting out of the way. He was bouncing lightly on the balls of his feet, easily sidestepping Lucifer's bone shattering blows, learning his opponent's style and pattern of attack.

He was taking his time and from the side of Lucifer's supporters whistles and catcalls could be heard but Dean ignored them. He needed to place his own punches well if he wanted to knock out Lucifer with minimal damage to himself. Finally he fought back, catching Lucifer in the side of his lower back, just about where his kidney should be, with one fist and under the jaw with the other.

It should have knocked him out or the pain should at least have slowed him down. But that didn't happen. At least not right away and Lucifer seized his chance of having Dean close enough to actually hit him and when Dean saw Lucifer's fist swinging towards him he didn't have enough time to get out of the way anymore. He just turned his head to somewhat lessen the force of the impact but it was still enough to send him to the floor.

It hurt like hell and he was lucky not to pass out and also lucky that Lucifer now seemed so sure of himself that he waited until Dean got up again. Dean was thankful for that little break as he shook his head to clear his vision. He was sure that usually it wasn't beneath that man to kick someone who was already down.

Slowly Dean got back up to his feet, slower than necessary really but he wanted Lucifer to believe that he was in bad shape now and for that reason he swayed a little when he was upright again. He slowly advanced on Lucifer, who was now certain to have already won, and carefully placed his next blows, hitting his opponent's solar plexus as hard as he could, finally getting a reaction as Lucifer's breath rushed out in a surprised gasp of pain.

Dean quickly followed that punch with another one to the side of Lucifer's head, aiming for his temple. He hit hard again. Not hard enough to do any real damage but still with enough force to knock him out and finally the giant crashed to the ground, unconscious.

Dean bent forwards, resting his hands on his knees as he tried to catch his breath and waited for the pain in his side to ease where Lucifer had managed to hit him right before Dean had knocked him out. Lucifer's supporters had quickly scattered, now that their leader was defeated and the man who had done it had a cheering crowd behind him.

Cas quickly came forward now, putting a hand on Dean's shoulder and gently helping him into an upright position, ignoring his own aching ribs for the moment.

"Thank you, Dean," he whispered and winced slightly when Dean leaned heavily onto his shoulder.

At that moment the guards finally entered the cafeteria, armed with batons, which were no longer necessary. The fight hadn't really lasted very long, although it had felt like a long time to Dean. Two guards came to either side of Dean and Cas and led them away, while the rest of them struggled with the still unconscious Lucifer, trying to somehow move him to the medical ward for the moment.

Sitting in the director's office Dean and Castiel both waited a little nervously for the director to finish his talk with the guard, who probably filled him in about the events in the cafeteria. Finally the quiet conversation stopped and the director returned to them and sat down behind his desk with a stern look on his face.

"Mr. Winchester," he sighed and Dean hung his head a little. That didn't sound good. "Tom told me about what happened," the director continued, referring to the guard he had just spoken with. "He saw the whole thing. I know you did it to help Mr. Novak but..."

"But it's not a good idea to get into a fight when your parole has just been granted," Dean finished, sounding resigned.

Cas looked at him then and when Dean felt his gaze on him he turned to look into those deep blue eyes, which clearly said how sorry he was for everything that had happened. Dean just shook his head slightly and gave Cas a small sad smile, telling him it wasn't his fault.

"I'm not going to take your parole away from you," the director interrupted their silent conversation and Dean looked up at him, "but I can't let you have your 'good time off' anymore."

"I understand," Dean answered, relieved that his parole wasn't in danger. He could live with an extra six weeks in prison.

"I know what your motives were and I wouldn't punish you at all if I could but I have to set an example to the other inmates to prevent more fighting. Therefore you and Mr. Novak will spend your free time locked up in your cell for one week. It is also for your safety," the director told them, looking directly at Cas during the last part.

Cas nodded. "Thank you," he quietly said, feeling better knowing that he wouldn't have to face Lucifer's supporters for another week. They were probably out for his blood now and it scared him.

"Do you want to tell me what happened?" the director asked Castiel who nodded again. The director seemed to be a good man and Cas felt that he could trust him.

"In the shower yesterday Lucifer told me that he had chosen me as his. As his pet to be exact and that he wanted me to bend over and..." Cas stopped for a second and swallowed hard. "I said no and he told me he'd teach me to defy him and then he and his friends started beating me until a guard came in to tell them to stop fighting. The guard didn't see me. I was already on the ground and that's how Dean found me. And then this morning Lucifer tried again to get me but Dean wouldn't let him."

"Yes, Mr. Miller is bad news," the director agreed gravely.

"Mr. Miller?" Dean asked.

"Yes. The man who calls himself Lucifer. Apparently the name Nicholas Miller is too tame for him," the director explained.

"He shouldn't be here at all. He's a freakin' sociopath and belongs with the heavy-weights," Dean told the director who only nodded, knowing full well that a low-level security prison wasn't the right place for that particular kind of criminal.

"You're right. He has a history of violence and of raping weaker inmates at other institutions. But he has only been convicted of grand theft auto this time and nobody was hurt. So until he really crosses a line in here, we're stuck with him."

"Until he kills someone you mean," Dean guessed and the sad and helpless look on the director's face confirmed his suspicion.

After this the conversation was over quickly, the director telling Dean to get to work or see the nurse if he so needed, which Dean declined, and informing Cas that he had been assigned to kitchen duty. "You should be save there," he added and Cas thanked him for that choice.

Before he left the office Dean turned around once more. "What happens with Lucifer now?" he asked.

"He will spend two days in isolation and then go back to his regular cell. That's another reason why I want the two of you in your cell during free time for a week. Give him a few days to cool off," the director explained and then reached for his phone, clearly indicating to Dean and Cas that they were now dismissed.

Dean doubted that a few days would be enough for Lucifer to cool down but it was all the director could do for them right now and he and Cas carefully walked along the hallway, supporting each other on their way to work.


	5. Chapter 5

Dean dropped Cas off at the kitchen and then went on to the garage for his own work. His side really hurt like a bitch now but he couldn't take the day off and play sick. First of all he couldn't show any weakness or Lucifer's supporters would be sure to take advantage of him, if they thought they could. And second, he needed what little money this prison job made him for the start of a new life when he got out. The more money he saved now the easier life outside would be. So he gritted his teeth and went to work.

He saw Cas briefly during lunch but he was handing out food so they didn't get a chance to talk. But he seemed fine and even smiled at Dean and gave him an extra large scoop of spaghetti sauce with lots of meatballs when Dean got his lunch.

"Thanks," Dean said casually but stared at Cas for longer than necessary to thank someone for giving you your food. But Cas held his gaze and after a moment Dean had to break their eye contact before someone else did it for them. He gave Cas a wink though before moving on but not without quickly looking back to see Cas look surprised and then shrug before he turned to the next man in line.

Dean carried his tray over to a fairly empty table and sat down at the far end so there was no one sitting directly next to him. Setting down his tray he had to be careful not to wince at the sudden sting in his side and he slowly lowered his body down onto the chair, almost sighing when the pain stopped.

He started to eat, enjoying the extra meatballs Cas had given him. How had he known? The thought of the man brought the memory of bright blue eyes floating into his mind and Dean wondered why the hell he'd winked at Cas. The poor man had enough to deal with already for the moment; Dean really shouldn't flirt with him. Any other time he would have done so immediately but this situation was different. Even though Dean usually preferred women and hadn't been with a man often, he would have ignored all women, had he met Cas in a bar.

But he shouldn't flirt with him now. He hoped he hadn't scared Cas with his wink. It had been a thoughtless, reflexive action. He could probably make up some cock and bull story should Cas bring it up later. But if he didn't Dean would do things the Winchester way and ignore it and pretend nothing ever happened. He liked Cas and his first instinct was to protect him not fuck him. Dean had always protected his little brother from their father and even though Cas looked nothing like his brother and was actually older than him, Dean felt his big brother protectiveness surfacing again with him.

When Dean returned to their cell that evening Cas was already there. They'd been allowed to shower alone so they wouldn't have to face any other inmates which might have led to more fighting. Dean had put on a tough face all day but now that he was back in his cell and only Cas could see him, he sat down heavily on Cas bed, grimacing and holding his side. Working all day hadn't made it any better and the pain had grown continually all day as the bruise developed.

Cas gave him a worried look but didn't say anything. He figured Dean wouldn't really want to talk about it. His own ribs still hurt, too, so he knew exactly how Dean felt. He could return the favor Dean had shown him the night before though and so he wet a washcloth and handed it to Dean who took it with an acknowledging look and pressed it against the bruise on his face.

"Thanks, Cas." It wasn't really cold enough to help a lot but it was the thought that counted and Dean appreciated it.

"You're welcome." Cas sat down on the bed next to Dean, it was his bed after all, and they spent some time sitting there in amicable silence.

Finally, when the cloth wasn't cool anymore, Dean got up, hung it away to dry and then climbed up onto the top bunk. He laid down and tried to relax but when Cas got up to get something from the shelve he realized that he had forgotten to take his book up with him. He turned onto his side and looked over the edge of his bed to Cas, who was holding some sort of diary.

"Hey Cas. Could you hand me that book over there?" Dean asked, since Cas was standing up already.

"This one?" Cas said, holding up the right book and Dean nodded. Before Cas crossed the little room to give Dean the book he looked at it and read the description on the back.

"Uh, horror," he said and shuddered as he handed Dean the book.

"You don't like horror stories?"

"No, I don't. Never have and probably never will," Cas told him.

"But you have watched a scary movie with a girl to make her move closer to you, maybe grab your hand, right?" Dean said, making it sound more like a statement than a question.

"Actually no," Cas answered. "I was afraid I'd be the one looking for hand to squeeze. I didn't want to embarrass myself."

Dean laughed at that admission and Cas grinned and stared directly at Dean's eyes for a moment before he sat down on his bunk and started writing and Dean opened his book to find the place where he had stopped reading the night before.

For about an hour they were quiet, winding down from their day, Cas with writing and Dean with reading. Then their door was opened and a guard came in with another inmate who carried two trays with food and the guard gave a letter to Cas.

"This came from your lawyer today for you," the guard told Cas and then looked at Dean. "Nothing for you, Winchester. Sorry." The guards all knew Dean's story. They knew the stories of all the inmates they worked with. They knew he had done what he'd done for his brother and that he hadn't heard from him since turning himself in. In the beginning he had hoped for a least a letter from Sam and had kept asking the guards if they had a letter for him but they never had. Now he didn't need to ask anymore, they told him on their own.

"You'll be having lunch at the cafeteria still this week but breakfast and supper you'll eat in here," the guard explained the presence of the trays. "We'll pick the dishes up in half an hour."

Then Cas and Dean were alone again and Dean got off his bed to eat while Cas was busy reading his letter. He read slowly and thoroughly and Dean was curious about its contents but he didn't want to ask. He gave Cas the time he needed and started eating. Finally Cas put the letter away and started eating as well, not saying one word about what the letter said.

When they had both finished eating Dean couldn't wait any longer and had to ask. "What was the letter about?" He tried to sound neutral, not knowing whether Cas had been given good or bad news. The guy had kept a completely blank face since he'd read the message and Dean hadn't been able to guess a thing, but from the lack of emotions Dean expected the worst. Cas would probably make a good poker player, Dean thought and at that moment Cas finally started to speak.

"Anna is optimistic that she can get me out. She says she has found a lead and she's following it right now. She didn't want to give me too much information yet but she says she'll visit in a few days when she knows more," Cas told him and chanced a small smile which Dean returned. It had been good news after all.


	6. Chapter 6

Their week passed by easily in that pattern. They'd eat in their cell, go to work, meet briefly during lunch, go back to work and then spend the time before the lights went out with talking, reading or, in Castiel's case, writing letters. They got to know each other, learned more about the other's life stories and became friends.

Their routine was only interrupted once, on the day Lucifer got out of isolation. It happened during lunchtime, the only time Dean and Cas got into contact with all the other inmates that week. Cas wasn't even handing out the food that day. He was working in the back, making sure that there was always enough food available up front, so things would run smoothly.

He was just refilling the chocolate pudding for dessert when it happened. It was a rare occasion that the prison kitchen served dessert and all the grown men were excited about this like little kids. All, except Lucifer, who was right at the front of the line. And when he saw Cas behind the counter he let out a roar that sounded hardly human anymore. He dropped his tray and started climbing over the counter to get to Cas.

The poor man had been paralyzed by terror since he'd first seen Lucifer in the line and was still just standing there. He didn't even move when Lucifer deliberately knocked the tub of pudding from his hands, showering him and all people around him with blobs of chocolate pudding. Fortunately for Cas the pudding made the tiled floor very slippery and when Lucifer took another step towards him to grab him, he slipped and hit his head on his way down, knocking himself out.

While the guards were busy with Lucifer, Dean rushed over to Cas, who was still standing in the exact same spot as before, looking completely shell-shocked. Dean had watched the entire incident, but it had all happened so fast that he hadn't had the chance to jump in and help Cas. He was glad that Lucifer had been too stupid to really harm Cas, but the guy looked like he hadn't yet realized that the danger was over.

"Cas, are you okay?" Dean asked, carefully touching Cas' pudding free left shoulder. Cas jumped at the touch and then turned to look at Dean, his eyes wide.

"Hey, Cas. It's over. Lucifer is gone," Dean told him and finally Cas looked around realizing that Dean was right.

"He's gone. He didn't hurt me," Cas repeated in surprise, looking down at himself. "I'm covered in pudding," he added, finally almost sounding normal again and Dean chuckled.

"Yes, you are," Dean agreed and used his finger to wipe some pudding off Cas' cheek and then stuck the finger in his mouth, closing his eyes in bliss at the taste of chocolate. Cas watched him for a moment and then followed suit, licking the specks of pudding off the back of his hands and forearms.

"This is good," he said, when his skin was pudding free again.

Dean nodded. "Yes. And that's the reason why Lucifer just made a bunch of enemies. No one messes with our pudding." His tone sounded still amused when he said this but Cas thought that he could hear a serious note in there as well. It probably wouldn't be bad if Lucifer made some new enemies. Maybe his enemy's enemies could be his friends?

Before he had time to think about this further more guards came into the cafeteria to restore order. Everyone who was covered in pudding was taken away to clean themselves up, while the rest of the inmates had to eat their lunch, sadly without dessert.

"How are you?" Dean asked Cas when he saw him again in their cell later that day.

"Still kind of shaken. Lucifer is back in isolation though. There shouldn't be any trouble for a few more days." He took a shaky breath and Dean had the feeling that something else was up as well.

"That's good. So, what did you do all day? Did you have to go back to working in the kitchen after what happened?"

Dean wanted to know what was wrong but he didn't want to outright ask. Something was clearly bothering Cas even though he tried to hide it. But Dean could tell from the look in his eyes, his posture, the sound of his voice.

Dammit, Dean thought to himself. He couldn't believe how well he already knew this man. He'd only met him a few days ago. But there was something about Cas that called to him, made him want to protect him from all harm and it also made him understand him. He had never felt this with anyone else before, only with his brother but since Sam was family he had never wondered about it.

"We were supposed to go back and clean the floor and everything that got covered in pudding. But Anna came to visit me this afternoon, so I was excused."

"She has excellent timing," Dean grinned and Cas smiled back weakly.

"She needed my signature to be able to follow a lead," he continued and Dean could suddenly hear unshed tears in his voice. What kind of lead could Anna have found to get this reaction from Cas. He was about to ask him some more but Cas started speaking again on his own.

"She needed my permission to exhume Claire's body," he told Dean and a tear slid down his cheek.

Dean handed him a handkerchief, feeling a little uncomfortable and he didn't know what to do with the crying man who was talking about his dead daughter. He had told Dean about her. His beautiful little girl, the pride of him and his wife Bela. But the girl had been sick. She'd been born with a heart problem and had died at the age of four. That had only been a year ago. And now Anna wanted to dig up her body.

"Why would she need that?"

"She thinks that Bela and Zachariah, my boss, already had an affair before we got married. Maybe even before we met. She thinks they planned all this for a long time and when I entered the firm, Bela went out with me and married me, so she and Zachariah'd have someone to take the fall for them eventually. She thinks Claire might not even have been my daughter," Cas explained and now he was really crying.

Dean felt helpless. He wanted to comfort Cas but he didn't know how. He sat down next to him on the bed and hesitantly put his hand on Cas' back, patting it awkwardly. Cas didn't seem to mind. He leaned sideways towards Dean a little, who was wondering whether it would be okay to put his arm around him in this situation.

"I feel like I lived a lie for the past years. Nothing was real," Cas sobbed and suddenly turned his head to hide his face against Dean's shoulder.

When Dean felt the tears wet his shirt he decided he didn't care about etiquette anymore and gently held the man in his arms, like he had held his brother when he had gotten his heart broken for the first time by his girlfriend Rachel.

"I'm sorry you have to go through this. I'm sorry all these things come to the surface now," he softly told Cas who was still crying silently and shaking in his arms.

"I'm sure Anna has a good reason for doing that. She wouldn't put through this ordeal if she didn't think it would help you," he soothed.

"But what…what if she finds out…that Claire…was not my daughter?" Cas asked between sobs and Dean had to fight the urge to hold him even closer and kiss the top of his head.

"Claire was your daughter in every way that counts," he said instead. "No matter what Anna finds out. No DNA test can change the fact that she loved you as her Dad and you loved her. You were there when she started to speak and when she took her first step, not Zachariah. You read her a story at night and gave her a goodnight kiss. You were there to help her when she fell and scraped her knee. You were a father to her every minute of the day and that is what is important."

After his little speech Dean waited a moment for it to sink in and finally Cas stopped crying and moved his head. He sat up again and Dean quickly let his arms fall away from around him.

"You're right," Cas told him, sniveling once more and then taking a deep, steadying breath. "Thank you. Sorry for breaking down like that." He got up and suddenly looked a little bit embarrassed, before quickly turning his back towards Dean to wash his face at the small sink.

"Don't mention it," Dean answered lightly but he was relieved when their door was opened and their food arrived, effectively breaking the sudden awkward tension between them.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to figure out how the legal system works in a case like Cas' but it's really hard to find and when I do find something I feel like I need legal training to understand it, which I lack. So mostly this is what I think how it should work and what I saw on TV or read in books. And I think in reality things would take much more time than I want for this fic, anyway. But hey, it's fiction ;)

Dean had trouble concentrating on his work today. His thoughts were with Cas, who was in court at the moment. Anna had been right. Claire had really been Zachariah's biological daughter. Cas had been devastated when he'd found out and Dean had spent several hours that night talking to him to try and cheer him up with only little success.

But Anna had also found something else. A signature of Castiel's name on a document used to transfer the stolen money out of the country had been proven to be forged and the expert Anna had found was reasonably sure that Bela had done it. This was enough evidence to reopen and reexamine the case Anna had thought and today they were in court to achieve just that.

Dean had seen Cas right before he had left. He had looked handsome and smart in his nice suit and he'd been carefully optimistic. Dean couldn't wait to see him that evening to hear how things had turned out.

It was just after dinner, which Dean now had together with all the other inmates again, when Cas returned to their cell. Dean was sitting on his bed pretending to read something incredibly interesting to mask the fact that he'd been waiting for Cas to get back. He put down his book after a moment and looked at Cas expectantly but the other man had put on his poker face again. He was staring right back at Dean, showing no emotions at all when their gazes locked.

Finally though, after several seconds of intense staring, Dean thought he saw an amused twinkle in those blue eyes and Cas couldn't hold back any longer and smiled.

"It worked?" Dean asked hopeful and Cas nodded.

Dean jumped down from his bed, landing right in front of Cas, thereby unintentionally invading his personal space. For a few seconds he just stood there awkwardly, unsure of what to do, when neither of them moved. He settled on clapping Cas on the shoulder before taking a step back and saying, "Well done."

"I didn't do anything. It was all Anna. She's brilliant. The case has been reopened and trial starts next week," Cas told him, sounding very happy about this.

"That sounds great. Will Anna be able to gather enough information to clear your name by then?"

"She's been given permission by the court to have Bela's personal belongings searched since she forged my signature. She's optimistic that there will be more evidence and even if not she might have already created reasonable doubt. So all things considered it's looking good," Cas told him.

Cas kept talking for a long time that night, telling Dean exactly what had happened at court. Dean didn't mind. This Cas was different from the terrified man he'd met just a little over one week ago. Damn, Anna had been really fast. She really seemed to be a brilliant defense lawyer, Dean thought. Which led him to wonder why Cas had been convicted in the first place. If Anna could dig up such strong evidence in only a little over a week, why hadn't she been able to do so before?

"She didn't defend me the first time," Cas explained when Dean voiced his confusion. "She doesn't live here in Kansas. She lives in New York. I was innocent and never expected to be convicted, so I told her I'd be fine and she shouldn't fly over here for this. I guess she shouldn't have listened to me but I just honestly never expected to end up in prison."

"But now she's here," Dean said matter-of-factly.

"Now she's here," Cas agreed with a soft voice that showed his love for her and touched Dean somewhere deep within. "And she has already found so much. My other lawyer just didn't bother to look beyond the apparent facts and I didn't notice that until it was too late."

"Lazy dick," Dean muttered and Cas laughed. They kept talking for a while about all kinds of things until they both drifted off to sleep.

Two days later Anna visited Cas again and when he returned to the cell a bit later he was so happy, Dean could hardly get him to talk and make sense. Finally, as a last resort he went to the sink and splashed a load of cold water into Cas' face, which made him stop talking for a moment, so Dean could actually get a word in.

"I take it Anna told you something really good, since you're so excited," Dean said and handed Cas a towel so he could dry his face.

"She did," Cas answered, calmer now.

"Would you mind starting at the beginning again? I didn't get a word of what you said earlier," Dean asked and Cas started to blush slightly in embarrassment about his earlier excitement.

"Of course. Sorry. Okay, Anna went through Bela's things and found that she had a safe deposit box I didn't know about. She had it opened and inside was all the evidence she needs. Bela kept track of exactly how much money they stole and when. And where it went, too. It's amazing. There is no way they won't overturn my conviction. They have to, now."

"That sounds great," Dean smiled and couldn't help but get infected with Cas' enthusiasm. He really hoped things would work out well for him and soon. But from what Cas had told him about his former work place Dean was sure that Zachariah's firm had a big and able legal department which would do whatever it took to keep all blame away from the boss and make it stick to Cas. He was confident that Anna was prepared for that but it would be difficult.

The days until Cas' next court date passed quickly and without much trouble. Not that Cas would have noticed any trouble in his still elated state. Not even Lucifer could bring him down anymore. The prospect of possibly getting his name cleared soon was so overwhelming that he wasn't scared anymore. Or maybe he just didn't notice Lucifer at all. Dean thought that this was very well possible because several times Cas had almost run into him.

But, just as Dean had predicted, Lucifer had made many enemies with the pudding affair and Cas was never alone. There were always people around him just waiting for Lucifer to give them an excuse to try and beat him up. And that happened frequently even without Cas being involved. Mostly those encounters ended with Lucifer back in isolation and his opponents in the medical ward.

Cas didn't notice any of those things. When Dean told him at night he was surprised by the day's events every time. Dean could only shake his head at him. It was really time that the court date came. Cas would not survive much longer the way he was acting right now. Eventually Lucifer would get him on his own. So Cas had better get out of prison before that happened.

But Cas excitement had faded when he returned from court after the first hearing in his new trial. Dean immediately noticed the drastic change in his cellmate's mood.

"What's wrong?" he asked carefully.

"Nothing," Cas answered. "Really, it's nothing," he assured Dean when he noticed the worried look on the other man's face. "I guess my hopes were just a little too high. I seriously believed that I would walk out of here today."

"Tell me what happened," Dean said gently and sat down next to Cas.

"Since Anna accused Bela and Zachariah to actually have stolen the money, they were subpoenaed to appear as witnesses and tell the court their side of the story. But they didn't show up. Everyone involved in the trial spent the entire day trying to find them but it appears they have left the country. Of course that makes them look even guiltier but it also delayed the whole trial. Now I have to wait another few days," Cas explained and Dean understood his disappointment.

But at least he still had the best chances to get out soon; he just had to wait a few more days. It wasn't as bad as Dean had expected upon Cas' return and he'd make sure that the next days would go as smoothly for Cas as possible.


	8. Chapter 8

"Winchester! Follow me, please," the guard called, interrupting Dean, while he was fixing the engine of one oft he industrial size washing machines the prison was using. Dean was surprised and intrigued. It didn't often happen that someone was called away from work, unless they had gotten themselves in trouble, which Dean was certain was not the case for him.

He followed the guard back to his and Cas' cell to find Cas there. It had been another court date for him and Cas was still in his suit. And not only that. He had a small cardboard box sitting on the bed and was putting his personal things inside. When he heard Dean at the door he looked up and smiled widely.

"You're leaving?" Dean was happy for Cas but he was also a little bit disappointed to lose his cellmate so soon again. He had really started to like Cas but he knew the other man was not made for a life in prison and was way better off outside. That didn't mean he wouldn't miss him though.

"Yes, I'm leaving. Anna was brilliant and convinced the judge beyond a doubt that I had nothing to do with the stolen money," Cas said. "My conviction was overturned and I was immediately released from prison. I can't believe I'm actually going home."

"That's great man. I'm happy for you," Dean said, smiling at Cas and his excitement.

Cas finished packing, he didn't have much he needed to take home with him, just some letters and his diary mostly and some other small things. He straightened and looked right at Dean.

"Thank you, Dean. For everything. I don't know what I would have done without you," Cas told him sincerely.

"Ah, don't mention it, man. It was nothing," Dean answered, almost embarrassed by the praise. "I wish you good luck for everything. You probably have to find a new job now, don't you?"

"Yes. But I will be compensated for everything Bela and Zachariah did to me, so I should be alright for a while," Cas said.

Then there was nothing else to say but the goodbyes. They stood in front of each other for a moment before Dean decided to give Cas a quick hug goodbye. It was a very brief and manly half hug though, with a few rough pats on the others' back. It was all Dean could do to keep this chick-flick moment as minor as possible.

"Goodbye, Cas."

"Goodbye, Dean," Cas replied, picked up his box and left.

The first few days without Cas were strange and Dean felt a little lonely. He hadn't felt like that since right after he had arrived in prison. Later he had even enjoyed having a cell for himself and being on his own when he felt like it. But now he didn't and he spent a lot of time playing cards with the other inmates, until they wouldn't let him play anymore because he was too good and the games with him got boring. Dean just always won.

After two weeks he got a letter from Cas, telling him that everything was going well for him and that he'd found a new job already as an assistant manager in a company that was Zachariah's biggest rival. With Cas' inside knowledge they hoped to finally become more successful and after what Zachariah had done to him Cas didn't feel that he owed him any loyalty anymore and had accepted the job.

The future of Zachariah's company didn't look very promising anyway and when the boss had returned to Kansas to take care of the new problems he had been greeted by law enforcement at the airport and had been taken straight to jail. He was now waiting for his trial.

Dean folded up the letter with a smile. He was glad that Cas was doing well and he was pleasantly surprised that he had gotten a letter at all. He hadn't expected Cas to think back at his prison experience if he could help it and he would have understood that. He made a mental note to write back to Cas but during the next few days he was too busy meeting with different people about his parole, to write a letter.

He had to start organizing his life after prison and even though most of that was done by other people for him, he had a few choices concerning housing and a job. Since there was now more time until he was released he could partake in some of the decisions, which otherwise would have been made for him. He thanked the director for it, knowing this wasn't common and that he had had a hand in this.

About a week later he finally had some free time again. Some new inmates had arrived and after Dean had watched them march down the hallway, he decided to start writing a letter to Cas. But when he sat down, he ended up just staring at an empty page for a long time with no clue what to write.

He hardly knew Cas and knew nothing about the man in the outside world. Their paths had crossed only briefly and even though they had been something like friends in prison that didn't mean they would continue to stay friends now. So what should he write about that was appropriate for the relationship they had shared? His life wasn't exciting, there weren't any big news to write about, at least not yet.

Just as Dean was ready to give up and postpone the letter, a guard appeared at his cell, leading a new inmate, shoving the reluctant man through the door. Dean looked up and surveyed him. This man looked like someone who was used to giving orders and having people do exactly what he said. He seemed a little arrogant and self-righteous and Dean instantly disliked him, without even having spoken with him.

"Dean Winchester," he finally greeted in a neutral tone, holding out his hand. He could at least give the man a chance. Maybe he would be the first case in which his first impression proved to be wrong.

"Zachariah Adler," the man replied and shook the offered hand. Then he turned away from Dean to put away his stack of sheets, towels and personal belongings. That way he didn't see the surprise on Dean's face and didn't notice the recognition dawn on his cellmate.

Dean had thought he'd heard the name Zachariah Adler before and soon remembered that that had been the name of Cas' boss. The man who had screwed his wife and framed him for a crime he hadn't had anything to do with. Now Dean was certain that his first thought about this man had been wrong. He didn't dislike this man. Dislike wasn't a strong enough word for what he felt. But at least he had something to write about for his letter to Castiel now.

And a few days later he had a lot more to write about. Lucifer was back out of isolation once again and had quickly chosen Zachariah as his new pet. Dean did nothing to warn or even help the man. He just made sure to be gone whenever Zachariah and Lucifer were in a room together. If he didn't see what happened he couldn't be expected to do anything about it. And since Zachariah had done a great job at antagonizing almost all the other inmates with his attitude, no one else was inclined to help him either.

Dean just quietly noted that more often than not Zachariah came back to their cell from the showers, walking very carefully and wincing when he sat down. Dean almost felt sorry for him, until he remembered what the man had done. And he made sure to keep Cas updated about what happened and also about the job he had been offered as an exterminator for when he was released.


	9. Chapter 9

The next weeks passed quickly for Dean and they really couldn't pass quickly enough. He managed to stay out of trouble and pretty much ignored Zachariah. Getting involved with his problems would just mean trouble, which Dean really couldn't use. So he left the man to his own devices, Lucifer had almost immediately broken him anyway, so there wasn't much Dean could do, even if he wanted to.

He had received another letter from Cas and he had written one to Cas, too. But after he had told him about Zachariah there wasn't really much to talk about anymore. His life just was pretty much the same every day. But he had written a letter to Bobby as soon as he had learned his exact release date. He didn't want the man to pick him up or anything. He just wanted him to know what was going on and he hoped that maybe Bobby would tell Sam the good news. Secretly he hoped Sam would come and meet him when he got out.

On his last day he was called away from work early because he had a visitor. When he entered the room there was a black woman waiting for him. His first impression was that she was someone he didn't want to cross. He sat down at the table across from her and had to resist the urge to squirm under her obvious scrutiny.

"Dean Winchester," she said sternly and he felt ready to confess anything at her tone, even though he hadn't done anything. It was like being five years old again and unsuccessfully trying to hide the fact that he had kicked the ball that had broken the window. If he did anything this woman would see right through him.

"My name is Missouri Moseley and I'll be your parole officer for the next seven months," she introduced herself.

"Nice to meet you, ma'am," Dean answered politely and slightly intimidated by the woman.

"Don't 'ma'am' me. I'm Missouri. We'll be seeing a lot of each other for the next months and I don't want to be called ma'am all the time."

"Yes, ma'am. Missouri," Dean answered, quickly correcting himself and she smiled warmly at him.

"As long as you do what I say, meet me once a week, go to work and stay out of trouble, we'll get along just fine. Step out of line and you find yourself back in here faster than you can say 'I'm sorry ma'am'. Are we clear?"

"Crystal clear. I won't cause you any trouble," Dean assured her.

"Great. Okay, here I have all the information for you about housing and your job. I'll give you a few days to settle in and you'll come and see me next week. If you have any pressing questions or problems before that don't hesitate to call me. My number is on the paper with my office's address and the time for your first appointment with me," she told him and gave him a few sheets of paper which he looked over quickly.

It was nothing new really, just all the information about his new life in written form. Dean thanked her and Missouri got up to leave. When she reached the door she looked back at him.

"You seem like a good man. Don't disappoint me and especially yourself," she said and then left the room.

"I won't," Dean muttered into the empty room and then got up when the guard opened the door for him, so he could go to his cell and start gathering his belongings. He would leave right after breakfast the next morning.

He hardly slept that night and that was only partly due to the pitiful whimpering from the bottom bunk. He had gotten used to those kinds of nightly sounds in prison. But he was so excited about finally leaving this place that he couldn't fall asleep. His mind kept making plans about what to do first once he was a free man.

A cheeseburger was first, he decided. He would find a diner that served decent cheeseburgers, hopefully with bacon on them, too. Burgers were rare in prison and not what Dean thought a burger should taste like. And he needed pie. He hadn't had pie in one year so he didn't even care what kind it was, as long as it was pie.

Yes, he'd definitely get some good food as soon as he was out. And second would be finding out what happened to his car. The car his Dad thankfully hadn't taken when he'd disappeared and which he loved as if it was a person. The '67 Chevy Impala in which he and Sam had learned how to drive. He didn't know if Sam had taken the car or if he had left it with Bobby. Sam had never felt for the Impala like Dean had. He would call Bobby soon and find out what happened to it.

Oh, and there was TV of course. He had never watched much TV in prison. It had always been a strange atmosphere with the other inmates around and he could never watch his favorite show without risking being mocked or worse. Dr. Sexy M.D. wasn't something you'd suggest watching in a prison but maybe he could catch up now. He just liked the show for some reason. He didn't know if the room he had been assigned even had a TV but if it did, he would watch that show again.

With these plans for the next few days he finally fell asleep and when he woke up in the morning breakfast couldn't be over soon enough. Finally he was allowed to change into regular clothes, take his few belongings and leave. The director and a few guards even said goodbye personally and wished him good luck. He had gotten along well with most of the staff but he still wouldn't miss them and they felt the same.

"Goodbye. I hope we'll never see you again," the director told him with a smile as he shook his hand and then the door opened and Dean went out the front door of the prison for the first time in a year.

He stopped for a moment, lifted his face up towards the sky and took a deep breath. Then he laughed happily and walked down towards the street that ran along the prison grounds. There he stopped and looked around. He hadn't called a cab or anything, holding on to the faint hope that Sam had finally gotten over his anger and had actually come to pick him up on his first day as a free man again.

But there was no one there. He waited for a few more minutes in case Sam was a little late but half an hour later there was still no one to pick him up. He sighed, swallowing his disappointed, and started to walk back up towards the building to ask for a phone.

"Dean!"

He stopped in his tracks and turned around at the shout. Someone had come after all, just not the someone he had waited for. It was Castiel who had parked his car at the curb and gotten out to call after Dean.

"Cas. I didn't expect to see you here," he said and he was almost as happy to see Cas as he would have been to see his brother.

"I…I didn't know if you had someone to pick you up and I thought it would be nice to see a friendly face. Are you expecting someone else?" Cas felt a little bit unsure, now that he was there. It had seemed like a good idea to come here but maybe Dean didn't want to see him.

Dean walked towards Cas and smiled at him. "No, I'm not expecting anyone else. Thanks for coming. You didn't have to do that."

"Yes, I did. I owe you a lot and this is just a small thing I can do for you. I would have been here sooner but traffic was crazy today," he explained as they walked to his car.

Dean put his things on the backseat and then the two men got into the car. "So, where do you want to go first?" Cas asked and Dean didn't need to think long.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean's first day as a free man. Enjoy :)

'Where do you want to go first,' Cas had asked and Dean knew the perfect answer to that question.

"I would really like to go to the best diner in town and get a burger," Dean grinned. "If it's alright with you," he added with a quick look at Cas.

"Sure. I don't have to be at the office today. I can from home mostly," Cas told him with a smile. He started the car and drove straight to the next diner, one that he knew to serve excellent food.

The diner wasn't full. It was the middle of the morning and there were only a few people there to drink coffee. Dean ordered a bacon-cheeseburger, even though he had just had breakfast. He couldn't wait and needed one now. Cas only ordered coffee and sat with Dean while he ate, almost moaning at the awesome taste of the burger.

When Dean was done with the burger he called the waitress to their table. Cas expected him to ask for the bill but instead Dean ordered pie. Cas only smiled and shook his head but didn't say anything. He got another cup of coffee and enjoyed watching Dean and how happy something as simple as food could make him. He was glad he had decided to take the time to pick him up from prison.

When Dean was finally done eating he gave Cas his new address and Cas drove him there. It was an apartment building at the edge of town, not the best area but not the worst either. It was what Dean could afford right out of prison and where he was accepted as a tenant. Missouri had gotten the room for him and as far as he knew he'd share the apartment with someone else who was also out on parole.

"So this is where you live now?" Cas asked when they sat in car outside the building. It was a big building that felt cold and uninviting and Cas thought it was hardly better than prison.

"I guess so," Dean answered not sounding very impressed by the place either. "Maybe it's better inside. You shouldn't judge a book by its cover, right?"

"Absolutely. How long do you have to stay here before you can move somewhere else?" Cas replied and it made Dean laugh.

"I don't know. I guess as soon as I find something I can afford and where they accept an ex-convict. And Missouri would have to agree, too," Dean said, still chuckling. "Missouri is my parole officer," he explained when he noticed the confusion on Cas' face.

"Ah," Cas simply said and for a moment they just sat there in silence, watching the building and the people coming and going. Finally Dean moved, unbuckling his seatbelt and turning slightly towards Cas.

"I guess I should go inside, see what my room is like." He stared at Cas who held his gaze for a long time. Then Dean shifted again and opened his door. "Thanks for picking me up, Cas. It really was nice to see a friend," he smiled and then got out of the car and opened the rear door to get his things.

"You're welcome, Dean. If you ever need anything…" He reached into the pocket of his coat and pulled out a neatly folded piece of paper on which he had written his own address and phone number. "…or if you just want to hang out, give me a call." He handed the paper to Dean who unfolded it and read it quickly.

"Sorry, I didn't get any new business cards made yet," Cas told him, apparently embarrassed at the unprofessional piece of paper.

"No, it's fine. I will," Dean told him reassuringly as he put the paper in his pocket. He didn't say it but he actually thought the handwritten note was better than a printed business card. It was so much more personal and it made him happy that Cas had thought of doing that so they could stay in touch.

Their eyes met again for a moment before Dean straightened and closed the car door. With a small wave he walked to the entrance of the apartment building, the key Missouri had deposited at the prison for him feeling cold and strange in his hand as he opened the door. He turned around once more and saw Cas drive away before he went inside.

He would have liked for Cas to stay but right now he needed some time alone to settle and get used to his new situation on his own. But he was sure he'd want to hang out with Cas soon. Once he had gotten his new life in order. He didn't want to burden Cas with any problems he might have. And since he'd spent a year in prison, living with strict rules, there would certainly be problems while he learned to be in charge of his own life again. But he'd handle them when they came.

He went up the stairs to the third floor and found apartment 312, which was where he'd live from now on. He opened the door to a short, dark hallway which soon widened into a large room which seemed to be kitchen and living room at the same time. A very messy room with dirty dishes and empty bottles and an overflowing trash can.

Great, Dean thought as he stood there, surveying his new home. He was sorely tempted to go back to the door and check if he was really in the right apartment, when one of the three doors leading away from this disaster zone opened. It was the one with a sign on it that said 'Dr. Badass is in' and a mullet wearing man appeared. He looked like a Lyrnyrd Skynyrd roadie and Dean wouldn't be surprised if all the empty beer bottles were his from last night.

"You must be Dean. Hi, I'm Ash," he introduced himself. "The room over there is yours," he told Dean, pointing at the door opposite his own. Which meant that the third and last door was probably the bathroom.

"Yeah, I'm Dean. Nice to meet you," Dean answered though he wasn't quite sure yet if that was the truth. "Well, I'll be…in there then," he finished lamely, moving towards his room. He didn't really know what to make of that guy yet. He wasn't easy to label like the people he'd met in prison had been. But he'd probably find out more sooner or later, he thought as he put his bag down on the small bed and started to put his few belongings away in the closet and on the shelves that he found in his room. There was also a desk and a chair in front of the window so there was everything he needed, at least for now.

It turned out that Dean found out more about Ash sooner rather than later. He had spent most of the day setting up his room and doing some cleaning in the kitchen, even though it was not his dirt and therefore not his job. But he needed something to do and it was the obvious thing that needed to be done.

When Ash stuck his head out of his room later that day he was surprised and offered Dean a beer and the two men sat together and talked for a while. Dean learned that Ash was actually a computer genius and had been involved in some kind of internet scam and he'd been caught. He promised that that would never happen again but Dean wasn't quite sure if he was referring to doing something illegal on the internet or to getting caught.

And when Ash produced a movie later that night that he couldn't or shouldn't have yet, Dean was sure he had meant he wouldn't get caught again. He could only hope the guy was as good as he said he was and that he wouldn't drag Dean down with him if he wasn't.

For the moment he did get along quite well with him though and he enjoyed the movie, too, so living with this guy might have some advantages. After the movie Dean got ready for bed. It was late and he was used to sleeping at certain times and also he needed to get up in the morning for his new job. He had also wanted to call Bobby but had forgotten with everything else going on. He'd do it in the morning.

When he finished in the bathroom he found Ash asleep on the small sofa. He shook him carefully but the guy wouldn't wake so Dean just shook his head and went to his room. Ash would be fine and Dean really couldn't worry too much about someone else right now.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is very important, even though not much really happens here. I'm setting up a few things for later which you may or may not notice. Let's see if I can surprise you in later chapters ;) Anyway, like I said, not much happening and Cas isn't in this one either. But he'll be in the next. I hope you enjoy it anyway.

Work was okay, Dean found out the next day. He had never wanted to be an exterminator but it was alright for the time being and it paid the bills. His co-workers were quiet and kept to themselves but Dean hoped they'd eventually warm to him. He didn't need new friends really but someone to talk to during breaks would be nice.

The boss, Michael Milligan, was a no nonsense kind of guy, who told Dean right away that he'd have to start at the bottom and work his way up in the firm. That was only possible though if he followed all the rules to the letter. Dean promised him that he would and actually didn't mind the strict rules that much. It was what he was used to from prison and he would do whatever the boss wanted him to do because he really couldn't risk the job without risking his freedom, too.

"Basically you'll just do whatever needs to be done, whatever anyone here tells you to do. Especially my son Adam. It will be mostly cleaning the cars and the equipment. This is your chance to prove yourself to me, boy. If you work hard and do a good job, I'll start taking you out on jobs with me, teach you the business. Does that sound good?" Michael told him.

"Yes, sir, it does. I promise I will work hard and be useful to you," Dean answered and Michael nodded approvingly and gave Dean the assignment to wash the company's cars. That was definitely not as bad as Dean had feared and he enjoyed the work with the cars and when Michael came to inspect his work at the end of the day he was satisfied with his new employee.

When he returned to his apartment, Ash was sitting in the living room, working on something that looked like a self-made laptop computer. Dean watched for a moment but decided it might be better to not know too much about what Ash did and went to his room. He really needed to call Bobby now, tell him that everything was fine and ask about Sam. He was glad he hadn't only gotten a job and an apartment right out of prison, but also a new cell phone. One less thing to worry about.

"Hey Bobby, it's Dean," he said when the other man answered.

"Dean. How was your first day in freedom?" Bobby greeted and Dean told him about the apartment and his job and that things might not be ideal but where alright for the moment.

"Have you talked to Sam lately?" Dean finally came to the point he was most curious about.

"I called him when I got your letter to let him know that you were finally getting out of prison. He didn't say anything but I had the feeling that he wanted to go and see you. But from your question I take it he hasn't shown up," Bobby told him.

"No, he hasn't."

"Well, he hasn't called me either this week. Used to be that he checked in with me about once a week to tell me he was still alive. But than he met this girlfriend of his and forgot his common sense. She's not good for him but he won't listen to me. I mean, what kind of name is Ruby even?" Bobby complained.

"Uhm, a stripper?" Dean suggested and got a huff from Bobby as an answer.

"Listen, I'll try to get a hold of him and let you know in a few days, okay? I tried earlier today but he didn't answer and I don't like to talk to a freaking machine," Bobby decided and Dean agreed. They talked a little longer, catching up and then Dean ended the call because he was starving.

He went into the kitchen from where he could see Ash, who was still busy with his laptop thingy he had built. Dean searched the cabinets for clean pots and dishes and then started to cook with the groceries he had bought on the way home from work. It was just pasta but it was quickly done and tasty.

"Are you hungry?" he asked Ash who shook his head, pointed to a plate that was empty save for a few unidentifiable crumbs and held up a half-empty beer bottle.

"Okay, then. More for me," Dean said and wondered whether to keep the leftovers for dinner or pack them as lunch the next day.

When his food was done he sat down on the couch next to Ash who was playing some kind of computer game which made Dean curious, despite his earlier decision to stay away from Ash's computer stuff. He watched for a while to figure out what it was about. Apparently you had to find and kill all kinds of supernatural monsters and repeatedly save the world from the apocalypse. It looked like a lot of fun.

"You can play, too, if you want. There's an option for two players. I'll add you when you're done eating," Ash offered and Dean remembered that he had food that was slowly but steadily getting cold.

He quickly started to eat and found out that he needed some practice in cooking. It wasn't really bad but it could be better. The pasta was a little overcooked and the sauce was bland but he added quite a bit of cheese and then it tasted okay. When he got up to rinse his plate, Ash looked up at him apologetically.

"Sorry, I thought it was easier to add another player. I need a little more time to crack this," he told Dean.

"Sure, take your time," Dean answered and sat down with that day's paper that Ash had left on the kitchen counter. "I'll read a little."

He started at the front with the biggest news being about the bad world wide economy. Dean read a little but it was depressing so he moved on to the local stories. The first one wasn't much better. It was about a pretty bad car accident that had happened the day before, which had left the driver seriously hurt and the passenger dead. Dean remembered that Cas had complained about traffic when he'd picked him up, so that might have been the cause.

The next story was a happier one. A little girl who had been missing had been found again after two days. She had been looking for her kitty and when she'd finally found her, she was so lost that she couldn't find her way back home. Some hikers had found her and she and her kitty had been safely returned to their home.

The story made Dean smile and gave him a warm feeling. He was just about to get to the sports section when Ash called out. "Gotcha! Okay, Dean. I'm ready. Do you want to be the older or the younger brother?"

"I'll be the older brother. Means I get to call the shots," Dean grinned and folded the newspaper up, putting it on a shelf, so it wasn't in his way.

Ash gave him one of the two controllers he had somehow attached to his computer and explained the rules of the game. Basically they just had to gank all the monsters they could find, before the monsters killed them. The two men started to play and had a great time. Dean turned out to be really good at this game even though he had never played it before and the two of them played till late at night.


	12. Chapter 12

Bobby called the next day but he didn't have any news about Sam, he hadn't been able to reach him and Sam hadn't called either.

"Don't worry. I'll keep looking and I'll find him. I'll give you a call when I know more," Bobby promised.

"Thanks Bobby. I appreciate it," Dean said. "I wouldn't know where to start."

Work was hard the next few days but Dean did whatever he was told. He really wanted to prove himself and he liked working and being useful. So he was happy to help wherever he could, whenever one of his co-workers needed his help or had a job for him. Even when the requests were ridiculous or impossible, like the ones coming from Adam and his best friend Alastair often were, he tried his best.

Dean knew he couldn't complain. Adam was the boss' son and how would it look like anyway, if he complained to Michael about anyone during his first week. He hoped the two men were only doing those things because he was new and would get bored and stop eventually.

Other than that Dean was getting used to his work and his life as a free man and he quickly settled in a daily routine. As soon as he noticed this he called Cas. He had decided to get used to his new life first and then meet up with Cas, who was a part of his old life but one he didn't want to miss.

Cas was happy to get the call. He'd been waiting impatiently and had been tempted to call Dean himself, to find out how things were going and if he could help. But he knew that Dean wouldn't appreciate that and that he needed some time on his own now, so Cas had waited.

Now he was in front of the building, where he had dropped Dean off a few days ago. He looked at it skeptically before getting out of the car and walking up to the front door. He found the sign with the names 'Harvelle/ Winchester' on it and rang the bell. Dean had told him a little about his roommate but he'd said that Ash wouldn't be home this night so they'd decided to just hang out at Dean's apartment.

A few minutes later he reached he third floor and Dean opened the door for him, smiling warmly at him and Cas smiled back. "Hello, Dean," he said and Dean let him inside.

"Hi Cas," Dean replied and watched him while Cas walked around the place, taking it all in. He didn't think it was much better than what he'd expected after that first impression when he'd dropped Dean off here but he couldn't really say that.

"This is…nice," Cas finally said and Dean laughed.

"No, it isn't and you and I both know it," he replied and Cas laughed with him.

"You're right, this place is a dump," he agreed and looked around the mess in the kitchen/ living room that Dean hadn't had the time to clean up anymore after work.

"Yeah, my roommate's not …very tidy. But at least it's better than a cell and Ash is actually a pretty cool guy. He just doesn't understand the concept of cleaning up," Dean said and picked up a pile of clothes from the couch and went to the door with the sign 'Dr. Badass is out'. He opened the door, dumped the pile inside the room and quickly shut the door again.

"No wonder he mostly sleeps out here," he muttered. "That room's a freakin' disaster zone."

He sat down next to Cas on the now free couch, turned on the TV and found a ball game and they talked for a while about their new jobs and their new lives, occasionally commenting on the game, which neither of them was really following.

"So, this Ash guy, he's really good with computers, right?" Cas asked suddenly.

"Yeah, I'd say he is. Why do you ask?"

"Do you think he could track my wife, ex-wife, somehow? Bela's still out there somewhere and I'd feel better if she wasn't. Call me spiteful, but I'd really love to see her behind bars," Cas explained and Dean nodded.

"I understand. I don't know if he can but I'll ask," Dean promised.

Before Cas could say anything else Dean's phone started ringing and with an apologetic look he got up to get it.

"It's Bobby. I better take it. It might be about Sam," Dean said after checking the screen to see who was calling.

"Sure, no problem," Cas told him. He knew how much Dean missed his brother and that he was hoping to hear from him. So of course he'd have to take a call that might give him more information about Sam whereabouts.

"Hey Bobby. What've you got?" he asked right away.

"Not much. Nothing on Sam. He seems to have disappeared from the face of the Earth. I can't get a hold of him. So I looked for the car instead. Figured, a classic car like her, someone must have noticed," Bobby told him.

"Yeah, she's a real beauty," Dean replied and stared straight at Cas as he said that, giving him a flirtatious wink.

Cas was surprised and confused, which, he figured, was exactly what Dean had wanted to achieve. After all he only heard half of the conversation and was wondering if Bobby had asked Dean if he had female company. Whatever it was, he stared right back at Dean, right into those green eyes and Dean forgot that he was on the phone for a moment.

"Dean, you still there?" Bobby asked when Dean remained silent for too long.

"What? Oh yeah, yeah. I'm here. Sorry, what where you saying?" Dean asked and realized that Bobby had been talking for a while already and he hadn't heard a single word, too lost in Cas' eyes, which were now twinkling with laughter. Dean smiled at him but then turned away to better concentrate on what Bobby had to say.

"I found some hints about an Impala that was involved in a car accident on the day you got out of prison. And it wasn't far away from you either. I haven't started calling the hospitals yet but that will be my next step. I just wanted to tell you what I found," Bobby said and he sounded worried.

"Thanks Bobby. I'll call the hospitals myself and let you know when I find something," Dean said and sat down on the couch again, all thoughts of flirting with Cas gone from both of their minds at the mention of hospitals.

"Alright. Don't forget about that, you hear me?" Bobby said and then hung up.

Dean put down the phone and looked at Cas. "Bobby thinks Sam might have been in an accident. Remember the one you talked about when you picked me up from prison?"

Cas only nodded and put his hand on Dean's arm, lightly rubbing it for comfort. Dean took a deep breath and suddenly got up and started to search the kitchen shelves. After a moment he returned to the couch with a newspaper in his hand. It was the one he had read a few days ago and remembered it mentioning an accident. He showed it to Cas.

"It says that one person died and one was seriously injured. What if Sam is the one who died? I can't do it Cas. I can't call the hospitals and not find him. I can't call the morgues to ask for my brother," Dean said shakily and Cas pulled the paper onto his lap and quickly read the article.

"It says here that the person who was killed was a young woman, Dean," he said quietly and Dean looked up at him with hopeful eyes.

"Really? Oh, thank god. I mean, it's terrible that someone died, but…"

"I understand. Come on, let's call the hospitals and find your brother, okay?" Cas encouraged and Dean picked up his phone again and together they called the different hospitals, quickly finding the one where Sam was being treated after the accident.

There was no question that Cas drove Dean to the hospital and stayed with him the whole time. Dean talked to the nurse at the front desk, who immediately called another nurse, a pretty blond one, once she knew that Dean was the brother of the patient from the car accident.

The nurse, whose name was Jessica Moore as her name tag read, led Dean and Cas through the hospital to the room where Sam was lying.

"We've been trying to find his relatives but we couldn't reach you," she told them on their way through the maze of hallways to the intensive care unit.

"We haven't been in touch for a while," Dean explained vaguely.

"But you came now, when he needs you. That's what matters and I'm sure he'll see it the same way," nurse Moore said with a smile and Dean nodded.

"Here we are," she finally told them and let Dean and Cas enter the room first to see Sam.

"Sammy!" Dean rushed to his bed, gently taking his brother's hand in his, careful not to dislodge any of the tubes connected to his brother, keeping him alive. "What's wrong with him?" he asked, turning his head to look at the nurse.

"He's in a coma. He has been, since he came here. His condition is serious but not life-threatening," she told them.

This didn't do much to make Dean feel better. He'd been hoping that maybe Sam was only asleep. Cas sensed Dean's worry and fear for his brother and stepped behind Dean, squeezing his shoulder. Dean briefly covered the hand on his shoulder with his own, thanking Castiel for being there, for the support and comfort he gave so freely.

"Can't you tell us anything else?" Cas asked when Dean apparently couldn't find the right words.

"I'm sorry but I can't. But doctor Milton will be here soon. He'll be able to explain everything to you. You can wait here if you want," nurse Moore told them and then left the room, leaving the men alone with Dean's comatose brother, waiting for the doctor.


	13. Chapter 13

"Mr. Winchester?" a man in a white lab coat asked from the doorway. Dean looked up to see a brown haired doctor wearing tennis shoes standing there.

"Yes, that's me," he answered, getting up to shake the doctor's hand. "And this is Castiel Novak. He's a friend," he introduced Cas, who nodded at the doctor by way of greeting.

"I'm Gabriel Milton and I'm your brother's doctor," the man replied and entered the room.

"Please, can you tell me what's wrong with him? When will he wake up?" Dean asked anxiously.

"Your brother sustained a serious head trauma in the accident. He was unconscious when he arrived here and the scans showed some swelling of the brain and some minor bleeding. We kept him in a coma artificially to give his body time to heal. The scans from this morning look much better so we're slowly letting him wake up now. The coma is much lighter now than during the past week and he should wake up within the next few days," Gabriel explained.

"Will he be okay?" Dean wanted to know.

"That is always hard to predict with head injuries. We won't know for sure until he wakes up but I'm confident that there'll be no lasting damage," the doctor told Dean with a reassuring smile.

"And when will he wake up?"

"That too, is hard to predict. The meds keeping him under should be out of his system soon but it might still take a while for him to wake up. If you leave your contact information with Jess, we will inform you the minute he wakes up. Until then you're of course welcome to visit. Do you have any more questions?" Gabriel said and headed towards the door.

Dean shook his head. "Thanks doc," he said and sat back down by Sam's side.

"Alright. If you do have more questions, don't hesitate to ask. Just tell Jess, she'll be able to find me." Gabriel put his right hand in the pocket of his lab coat. "Candy?" he asked when he pulled his hand back out, now holding several pieces of hard candy in colorful wrappers. Dean and Cas both shook their heads and Gabriel shrugged. He unwrapped one piece and put the rest back in his pocket before he finally left the room.

"I'll go and talk to the nurse for you if you want," Cas offered, thinking that maybe Dean would like some time alone with his brother. Dean nodded but didn't say anything and Cas left the room to find Jess.

When he returned fifteen minutes later, Dean hadn't moved from his spot by Sam's side and Cas almost felt like an intruder for coming back into the room. "I told her everything she needed to know. We have half an hour now before we have to leave for the night."

"Okay," Dean said quietly still not looking anywhere else but at his brother. "You don't have to stay though, you know. I could take a bus or something later," Dean offered but he sounded so lonely and lost that Cas couldn't just leave him.

"I know. But I'll stay here. With you and Sam," he answered and now Dean turned his head to look at him, his eyes grateful.

"Thank you," he said.

"You need to leave now. You can come back tomorrow," Jess said softly when she returned half an hour later.

Dean nodded and thanked her and then he and Cas left the hospital. It was late anyway and he needed some rest. Cas drove them back to Dean's apartment building but when he stopped the car Dean didn't move to get out. He just sat there quietly and stared out the window and Cas gave him the time he needed and sat silently beside him.

Finally Dean began to talk and Cas listened to him because it was what Dean needed. He talked about his and Sam's childhood , about how he had always watched out for his little brother, in school and at home. He told Cas that Sam had run away once, as a teenager and that their dad, John, had been too drunk to even notice it. It had been Dean who'd taken John's car without permission and who'd found Sam and brought him back home before he could get hurt out on the street. And Dean had gotten punished for taking the car but he hadn't told John why he'd needed it.

Dean kept talking, telling Cas about his brother up until the day that prison had separated them. Cas already knew some of the things Dean told him, from earlier conversations but some of the stories were new for him. He understood how important family was for Dean and how much it must have hurt him, when his brother, for whom he had done everything, had turned his back on him. He really admired Dean for reaching out to Sam again.

When Dean was done talking he finally moved to get out of the car. "Thanks for being here with me tonight," Dean said when he opened the door and Cas reached out and grabbed Dean's wrist, stopping his movement.

"He'll be okay. He'll wake up and he'll be alright, Dean," he told him sincerely and Dean looked at him.

"I know. But thanks," he said softly and slowly pulled his arm out of Cas' grasp and went up to the building he lived in.

He was greeted by Ash who had returned in the meantime and was now busy actually doing some cleaning. At least he seemed to be trying to do that. He had dumped all the stuff from his room in the living room and was sorting through it, making different piles. Dean couldn't really recognize a system and only hoped that having the stuff out in the living room was only temporary.

"Missouri was here," Ash said by way of explanation, when he noticed Dean's raised eyebrow and his surprised expression. "She warned me to clean up a bit and not let you do all the work. It's better to listen to her."

Dean agreed with that assessment but he was impressed nonetheless. So far he had only spoken to Missouri once, when she'd surprisingly visited him at work, to see how he was doing and he hadn't told her anything about what living with Ash was like. But then she probably knew the guy for a while already.

Dean stayed up with Ash for a bit, telling him about Sam, before he went to his room to go to bed. He had only just closed the door, when it flew open again, barely missing him. Ash strode into his room.

"Sorry dude. I need to get something from your room. Needed a quick hiding place. I didn't expect Missouri to show up so late," he explained as he pulled back the small rug and loosened a floorboard. Then he reached under it to release a latch that held down another floorboard, right underneath Dean's bed.

Dean watched horrified as Ash extracted some computer drives and disks, that certainly didn't contain anything legal, from the small space.

"Dude, what the hell?" Dean asked, hardly able to believe what he was witnessing.

"Hey, relax. They'll never find that place," Ash tried to appease, sensing the outrage coming from Dean.

"Doesn't matter. You can't just do that. I don't care what you do in your own room but don't you fucking dare drag me into your shit," Dean told him, staying relatively calm with some effort. He could live with a messy kitchen and living room but this was taking things too far.

Ash didn't say anything else. He just nodded meekly and hurried out of the room, leaving Dean to finally get some rest.

The next day was a free day for Dean. At least free from work. He had an appointment with Missouri first thing in the morning.

"So, how have things been for you? Have you settled in well?" she asked warmly.

"Yes, I have. Thanks. Everything is going well so far," Dean replied. He had already decided last night that he wouldn't tell Missouri about Ash's little hiding place.

"Did Ash tell you about my little visit last night?"

"Yes, he did. And he already started picking up his room," Dean told her with a smile, which she returned.

"Good," she said. "Let's hope it lasts. Is there anything else you'd like to talk about?"

Dean hesitated but then he told her about Sam. She was nothing but nice to him and he felt that he could trust her with any problem he might have. She listened patiently and when he was done she promised to help him, should he ever need it.

Just as he was about to say goodbye and leave, his phone rang. He checked the caller ID and saw the hospital's number.

"Go on. Answer it. It could be important," Missouri encouraged him, upon seeing the look on his face and Dean answered the phone.

"Mr. Winchester? Dean Winchester?"

Dean immediately recognized Jess' voice. "Yes, that's me. Is something wrong with Sam?" he asked, suddenly worried. This could be the call he was waiting for but there was also the slight possibility of bad news.

"No, no," Jess quickly told him. "Everything is fine. In fact, it looks like he is waking up now. I thought you'd like to know that."

"Yes, absolutely. Thank you. I'll be right there," he answered and ended the call, almost beaming at Missouri at the good news. She offered to drop him off at the hospital, since she was going in that direction anyway and Dean gratefully accepted. He couldn't wait to get to Sammy now.


	14. Chapter 14

Jess met Dean outside Sam's room. She stopped him from going right in, wanting to talk to him first. "He's been awake for a few minutes now but don't expect too much. He's drifting in and out of consciousness and so far we haven't been able to talk to him."

"Okay," Dean replied hesitantly, not sure what to think of these news. "Can I go in now?"

"Sure. I just wanted to let you know what to expect," Jess answered and stepped aside to let Dean open the door.

Jess didn't follow him and Dean closed the door behind him to give him some privacy. Sam had his eyes closed and didn't move. He looked just like the day before and for a moment Dean wasn't sure if Jess had been right about him waking up. But when he sat down next to the bed and took Sam's hand in his, Dean thought Sam was reacting to him.

The hand in his tightened and held on to him and then Dean saw his brother's eyes flutter open. Dean got up from his chair to bend over his brother some. Just enough to make sure that his eyes really were open.

"Sam? Sammy, can you hear me?" he asked softly, full of hope.

"Sam, not Sammy," came the raspy and very quiet response.

"How do you feel?" Dean asked after a moment of just looking at his brother, whom he hadn't seen in so long.

"Like I've been in a car crash," Sam deadpanned and Dean smiled. Yep, this sounded a lot like the brother he remembered.

"Everything hurts and I'm thirsty," Sam continued and Dean immediately got up.

"I'll go and get the nurse. You just stay here," he attempted to joke and got a weak smile from Sam.

Dean quickly found Jess, who had apparently been waiting just around the corner. Dean quickly told her about Sam and what he had said and she promised to take care of him and asked Dean to wait. Dean was grateful for a little time on his own. He needed to think a few things through and figure out how he actually felt about his brother now.

He had waited so long for this moment. The thought of a reunion with his brother had kept him going while he was in prison. And when he had found out about the accident he had been worried for his brother. But now that Sam was awake and seemed to fine there was also anger mixed in there at Sam abandoning him like he had. Dean felt confused and conflicted. When his brother had opened his eyes, he had both wanted to hug and to punch him.

Of course he had done neither. Sam looked so damn fragile in that hospital bed, with all those machines around him and the tubes attached to him that Dean was afraid to hurt him if he touched his brother. But they would definitely need to talk about what had gotten into Sam and then Dean could still decide whether he deserved to be punched. But first Sam needed to get better. That was his number one priority and everything else had to wait.

"You can go back in now," Jess said a few minutes later. "The doctor gave him some more painkillers and he's better now."

"Okay, thanks," Dean answered and went back to Sam's room.

Sam was looking much better already, more alert and less pale than just the few minutes ago that Dean had left to get Jess. On the bedside table there was a bright purple, crumpled candy wrapper.

"I see Dr. Milton was here," Dean said with a smile, pointing at the little piece of paper.

"Yes, he was. And whatever he gave me was amazing. I feel great."

"Good, that's good. You had me worried there, when you were trying to impersonate a vegetable," Dean told him his tone more serious than his words.

"I'm sorry, Dean," Sam said quietly and sighed deeply. "Funny how me having to go to the hospital got us into this whole mess and now we're at a hospital again."

"Let's just hope things will go better this time," Dean said half jokingly.

Sam nodded. "I'm sorry. I really am. Not only for this…" he gestured at himself lying in the hospital bed, "…but for everything."

"Sam…it's not gonna be that easy," Dean said heavily and Sam looked at him with sad puppy dog eyes, something he'd always been extremely good at, but Dean didn't melt like he used to.

Sam started to speak again but Dean silenced him with a quick hand gesture. "We'll talk about everything, once you're better, okay? First you need to get fixed and be yourself again, not on some kind of meds anymore, deal?"

"Deal," Sam agreed but had one thing to say anyway. "I was going to pick you up."

"I know, Sammy. I know."

"It's Sam," Sam almost seethed but calmed back down immediately. "I wasn't alone. Ruby was in the car with me. Where is she? Is she okay?"

"Oh, Sam. I'm sorry, but the other person in the car with you didn't make it," Dean said gently, taking Sam's hand again, who squeezed his brother's hand tightly. Sam's face screwed up with the effort not to cry and after a moment he withdrew his hand.

"Could you…could you give me some time alone? I…I had no idea," Sam whispered and Dean could hear the unshed tears and the not yet voiced sobs in those words. He nodded and went to the door.

"We were arguing when it happened. I don't even know what the last thing I said to her was but we were arguing, so it probably wasn't anything nice," Sam added before Dean was out the door. Dean turned around once more and opened his mouth to say something but couldn't think of anything, so he just looked into Sam's sad eyes for a moment before leaving him alone, giving him some space to grieve for his dead girlfriend.

Dean walked through the halls of the hospital aimlessly for a bit, before going outside and sitting down on a bench in the nearby park. He got out his cell phone and dialed Cas' number.

"Hello Dean," said Cas, who must have recognized the number.

"Hey, Cas," Dean said. "I'm at the hospital again. Sam woke up this morning."

"Wow, that was fast. How is he?" Cas asked, happy about those news.

"He seems to be fine," Dean told him but didn't sound quite as happy as Cas would have expected.

"And what about you? How are you doing?"

"I'm okay," Dean answered but not very convincingly. He felt confused and conflicted and didn't know how to work through his feelings. But he wouldn't admit this to anyone and just put on a brave face and somehow get through this.

"Dean…" Cas said, clearly doubting that statement.

"Really, Cas. I'm fine. It's just a little too much at the moment," Dean told him, admitting quite a lot with his last comment.

"You sound like you could use some company. Where are you?"

"I'm still at the hospital. I was gonna go and get lunch now," Dean gave in immediately. He really could use some company and there was no one he could trust more than Cas.

"Alright. I'll be there in fifteen minutes," Cas said and then hung up. Dean looked at his cell phone, not quite sure what had just happened. But subconsciously he must have wanted Cas' company all along or he wouldn't have called him. He shrugged and put his phone away again and slowly made his way to the cafeteria.

He took his time and didn't have to wait long for Cas. They both got something to eat and sat down at a table that wasn't in close proximity to any others, giving them a little privacy.

"So, tell me about Sam," Cas prompted once they were almost done eating.

"Well, when I came here the nurse, Jess, told me they hadn't been able to speak to him but when I was with him he really woke up and we talked for a bit. He asked me about his girlfriend and asked me to leave him alone, when I told him she was dead," Dean summed the morning up for Cas.

"Okay, but he's gonna be okay. So what else is going on?" Cas asked and Dean couldn't hold back any longer and told Cas about his confusion concerning Sam and about what Ash had done and that he didn't know how to manage his life like that, without the strict rules he knew from prison.

"Do you feel better now?" Cas asked calmly when Dean was done.

"Yes, I do," Dean answered, sounding surprised.

"You can always call me when you need to talk, you know?" Cas told him, covering Dean's hand, which was lying on the table, with his.

Dean looked down at their hands but didn't pull his away. "I know. Thanks Cas."

"And about that thing with Ash. You could come and stay with me for a while if you need to get away. I have way too much space now that I'm on my own. I have spare rooms and you're welcome to one of them."

Dean was overwhelmed by this offer and didn't have any words at first. "Thanks Cas. That is very kind of you," he finally said.

"But?" Cas asked with a smile, knowing that Dean wouldn't give up what he thought he needed to do so easily.

"But really Ash is a good guy and I don't think he'll do it again. I'll give him another chance," Dean told him, saying exactly what Cas had expected to hear.

"Alright. Give me a call should you change your mind. Now come on, let's go. I'm sure you can't wait to get back to your brother," Cas said and got up from the table, only now letting go of Dean's hand.

"Aren't you coming?" Dean asked and Cas looked at him in surprise.

"Do you want me to?"

"Yes. You're my friend and I don't know where I stand with Sam right now," was all Dean answered but Cas heard all the unspoken things about feeling lonely and being afraid. Things Dean would never say any clearer than right then.

"Well, then I'm curious to meet your brother," Cas replied with a smile and both men got into the elevator that would bring them up to Sam's floor and when the doors closed, Dean slipped his hand back into Cas', looking straight ahead as if this was the most natural thing in the world.


End file.
